Avera
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Joined: 26 Dec 2005
Posts: 92
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 Posted: Tue Feb 27, 2007 9:46 am Post subject: A Fat Piece of Poetry |
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Just like to share a good bit of rhyming spam that was made over on Hunter. About a cutter I bought recently ^__^
Before I do, I've gotta give credit for Andikan for co-writing this. The third verse (by Andi, as well as 5 & 10) is more or less the source of inspiration for the rest of the story. Also, Sandival, ex-TLLer, sold me the ship (also has a cameo in it  ).
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The Fat Flounder: An Epic
It was about time Ave bought a boat -
A place to tart and something to float,
So with some dubs to spare,
And some locks of back hair,
She tracked down Sandi who gave her a quote.
Down at Aimuari was where they found 'er,
Ave never saw a ship fatter or rounder,
'Twas love at first whisk,
Her decision was brisk,
She clung to the hull and put claim on the Flounder.
Then badgeless Avera made a plea,
To Andikan, "please write on the O.B.B.!",
When Avvy returned,
She was a little concerned,
To find that he went on a spamming spree!
Next, she wanted to paint her new ship
And pimp up her ride with furni real hip,
But everyone knows,
Since she has little poes,
To the Inn she will go to beg for a /tip!
~~~
With a horde of bedrolls she got from the Inn,
Ave made a quaint lodging within the cabin,
Much to her dismay,
On the very next day,
She was swept out by torrents of bilge gushing in!
At sea, she was instantly faced by a Kraken,
No help from SF class that she had been slackin',
She drank a potion,
Whisked out of the ocean,
But already bruised from a pumm'llin' and whackin'.
Bedraggled and injured the pirate reported
To Captain Andi who thoughtfully noted,
"Such bad presentation,"
So with no hesitation,
In a click of a button poor Ave was demoted.
"This scuppering ship just brings misery!",
And in fury Ave deported it out to sea,
Then felt more of a dupe,
When engaged by a sloop,
Before she could jump off and leave it be!
~~~
She climbed up the Crow's Nest ('twas monstrous in girth),
Peered sadly at port that was too far to berth,
Then quite shocked to see,
That her ship's enemy,
Was the second most cleverest Captain on Earth.
The battle began with insults on show,
Andikan yelled, "I taught you all that you know!"
But quick on the banter,
Ave bit with a counter,
"No wonder I've always been navving so slow!"
Morale was anew when Ave reached for the helm,
Admiring the craftwork of fine polished elm,
She then held on tight,
And did a Straight-Straight-Straight,
And sent Andi's ship right to old Jones' realm.
It was victory for the Fat maiden Flounder,
Back at Aimuari Ave was glad to ground 'er,
A landlubbing lass,
Avera said, "Oh, alas --
The docks, there's no place safer or sounder."
Epilogue
Both sat at the dockside where Ave first bought 'er,
Though ravaged from battle it never looked hawter.
Sipping crystal clear mead,
Avvy held up the deed,
When a gusty sea breeze blew it out into water.
====================
Random thing that occurred to me before -- I think it's ironic that the forum subheading for here says "Non-pirate related thoughts", yet most of the threads in it are pirate related. Guess we're all kinda hooked, huh.
(Edit: Forgot something important  )
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Last edited by Avera on Wed Feb 28, 2007 8:33 am; edited 1 time in total |
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